


she's a peach scone

by cosmicpoet



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Drugs, F/M, Fluff, Friendship, Love Confessions, Weed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-18
Updated: 2018-04-18
Packaged: 2019-04-24 16:07:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14358930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cosmicpoet/pseuds/cosmicpoet
Summary: Kaito and Rantaro are getting high, and Kaito decides that this is the perfect time to confess his crush on Maki.





	she's a peach scone

“Rantaro…bro…these edibles aren’t hitting me at all,” Kaito says, taking another brownie from the tray.

“Woah, take it easy. You only gotta have, like, a quarter of one. Be _patient.”_

“Nah man, I ain’t about patience. All or nothin’.”

“Well, I’m not sitting through you tripping off your ass whilst I’m only moderately high. Pass the tray.”

Kaito passes the tray of freshly made pot brownies to Rantaro. He can’t blame himself for eating two full ones – the high hasn’t hit him yet, and he’s pretty confident in his tolerance for weed. Sure, he’s never tried edibles before, but he’s well acquainted with spliffs, and he’s certain he can handle this. Besides, he’s got nowhere to be any time soon, and he does boast that _recklessness_ is his middle name, so it can’t hurt to have an…experience…like this every once in a while.

“Yo, brilliant idea bro,” he says whilst Rantaro eats, “let’s get on a bong as well.”

“You’re fuckin’ mad,” Rantaro replies, laughing, “but sure. Whatever.”

“How’d you even _get_ so much weed?”

Rantaro taps his nose with his pointer finger and smiles. As he packs the bong, Kaito smiles up at the ceiling of Rantaro’s penthouse apartment. He’s always been a little in awe of how rich his best friend is, but he knows that Rantaro puts it to good use – as well as supplying their friendship group with weed, he’s paid for his younger sister’s university fees, and he regularly donates to charities. Kaito knows that he’s genuinely a good person, which is why he suspects that they get along so well – with his positive energy, and Rantaro’s kindness, they tend to do a lot of good together.

But not now. Now, they’re just putting a lighter to a bong and trying to get out of their minds.

It’s already too late when the edible hits them. They’ve been smoking for a good ten minutes, and Kaito’s head suddenly feels very light; it’s not bad, he doesn’t feel like he’s going to vomit or anything, but he feels very…out of this world. Which he likes.

“Yo,” he says, “I feel like space, y’know?”

“Yeah man, I get it. All them planets and shit,” Rantaro says, “it’s just fuckin’…you know, bro?”

“Oh shit yeah I know. Fuckin’ amazing.”

“You gonna go to space?”

“Hell _yeah,”_ Kaito starts laughing, “hell fuckin’ yeah. Gonna go to space and gonna…see all the aliens and… _woah I have an idea.”_

“Go on.”

“I’m gonna take Maki Roll to space.”

_“Bro.”_

“Bro I _know!_ Great idea, right? I just gotta…I just gotta tell her I love her first.”

“Oh man. How you gonna do that?”

“I dunno. I just…you got any advice?”

“You just gotta…bro…you know? Like…you just gotta…you know what I mean? You know what I’m sayin’ man?”

“Rantaro you’re…so fucking high and so fucking smart.”

“You get it though? You get it?”

“Oh yeah man, I get it.”

“You just gotta…it’s all good man…you just gotta…”

“Yeah bro. You’re so good at advice!”

“Thanks. I do try.”

“She’s just…you know? Like…beautiful. Like I see all the stars and they’re so bright and amazing and I’m like… _I get that…_ cause I’ve seen her, you feel me? She’s just…god, I love her. Everything she says is just smart and amazing and wonderful and revolutionary and I could look at her and listen to her talk for, like, forever. Why the hell would she ever go for someone like me?”

“No, man,” Rantaro says, “you gotta hype yourself up! Be like…I’m Kaito Momota…wait, what’s that bullshit thing you call yourself?”

“Luminary of the Stars! And it ain’t bullshit, bro,” Kaito laughs.

“Yeah…you gotta be like…yo _Maki Roll,”_ Rantaro immediately bursts out laughing once he says Kaito’s nickname for Maki, giggling as he lies down on the floor, rolling from side to side and patting Kaito’s shoulder.

“Carry on! I wanna hear advice from Rantaro Amami, ultimate wingman.”

“You gotta be like…Maki Roll…you like salad? Cause I got a big ol sausage waitin’ for you here.”

“Bro…sausage doesn’t go in a salad.”

“Oh _man._ Fuck. Uhh, okay. Be like…fuck, I got nothin’.”

“Man, she’s just so…god, I love her. Like, her hair is just so fuckin’ long. How does it do that? How’s it just so…long? Like how does she even _brush it?_ It’s always so nice, how the fuck?”

“You’re sayin’ this but like, have you _seen_ your hair? I’m kinda scared to smoke around you cause one wrong move with a lighter and all that hairspray’ll just go…poof.”

“Poof.”

_“Poof!”_

“But if Maki Roll has cool hair, and _I_ have cool hair…”

“Then who’s flying the plane?”

“No, man! I mean, like, we’re made for each other.”

“You gotta tell her.”

“What if she rejects me?”

“You just gotta…bite the bullet and do it, you know?”

“But…”

“I thought Kaito Momota, Luminary of the Stars, wasn’t scared of _anything?”_

“I’m scared of her not loving me back!”

“Man, shut up! She’s like, totally into you. Besides, what exactly have you got to lose by telling her?”

“She could never speak to me again.”

“Like that’s gonna happen. You’re like, the only person she _does_ speak to.”

“How do I tell her? Like, when do I do it?”

“No time like the present,” Rantaro says, throwing Kaito’s phone into the air. Although it should normally be an easy catch, it lands on Kaito’s stomach, and they both start laughing.

“Okay, okay,” Kaito says, “breathe. Just…calm it, bro. I’m gonna do it.”

“You’re gonna do it!”

“I’m gonna do it!”

He calls Maki, and puts the phone on speakerphone so Rantaro can listen in. Eventually, she answers.

“Hello?”

“Maki Roll! It’s me and Rantaro,” Kaito says, “say hi Rantaro!”

“Hiiiii.”

“Anyway,” he continues, “I just wanted to tell you, ‘cause I need to get it off my chest…you’re so damn beautiful, y’know? Like I see all the galaxies and shit in your eyes, and when I look at you I just…damn, I just fall in love. Everythin’ you say is so smart and witty, and you’re just…you’re a peach…you’re a peach scone. And I love you. And I had to tell you ‘cause if I didn’t tell you now I’d never do it. So like…I love you. Will you be my girlfriend?”

“Kaito, how high are you right now?”

“’M not high at all, Maki Roll! Why?”

“Because…for one, we’ve been married for a year.”

**Author's Note:**

> Just take it. Really, just take it. Is this serious? At this point, I don't know. Honestly - probably.
> 
> Anyway, dedicated to my amazing friend Sy because I thought of the headcanon of Kaito confessing his love to his actual wife whilst stoned out of his mind when I was talking to her. Stoner bros Kaito and Rantaro are our thing. She's my inspiration and I love her.
> 
> Title from 'Peach Scone' by Hobo Johnson & The LoveMakers.


End file.
